Fudge Hangover

I didn't know it was possible to have a fudge hangover...but it is. I indulged in my aunt's fudge two days in a row and woke up this morning with, what I can only describe as withdrawals. My pounding brain was telling me I needed caffeine and I needed it right away. So, after a lot of water, some Pepsi, and a couple of Tylenol, I was feeling much better. Did I learn from this little episode? Apparently not, because I indulged, yet again, in that fudge tonight. Seriously, her fudge is worth tempting fate.

We had a really great Christmas...except for missing H. The kids were blown away when they opened new mp3 players, wireless game controllers and quite a few other things that they had on their lists. They've been plugged in, listening to, wearing, and reading what they received every minute since. So, I'd say that happiness was achieved. Little Man is also enjoying his new teething rings and other assorted toys. I received new earphone buds (the memory foam ones), a beautiful bracelet from H via my parents, a small mirror with a "sister" poem on it from, well, my sister, and a shower radio that I've been wanting for about two years.

We spent Christmas Eve at my grandmother's house, eating posole and tamales. Yum! In the morning, we opened presents at my parents' and then the kids opened more at Grandma's. We followed that up with some delicious food: turkey, sweet potatoes, mashed potatoes and gravy, fruit salad, and much more. I ate two of everything...so good. It's been really nice visiting my family and spending time here. But I also can't wait to see H and see home. I love the city we live in. It's so green and vibrant. I love seeing my kids in their school. I hope we can find a nice, new place to rent. H will be heading this way after New Year's Day to bring us all home. I think it will be hard to say goodbye to my folks. I've really enjoyed staying here.

Well, I'll post more later. Got a lot on my mind and I'm sure I'll want to share some of it.

The Reason

Merry Christmas

Tired, but blessed.

Just thought I would post an update. Nothing new, just staying with my folks and hanging out with the kids. We've been to the library twice in the last week. Being away from the stress at home is a plus, but I miss my husband, and my friends, and Utah. I love my family here, and I could probably live here if I needed to, but I'd rather be back home. I hope we can head back after the holidays. H is trying to work things out quickly with the house and the bills. I have to say that all of this has been a great trial, but I would rather go through all of this than any number of other, more tragic, trials in life. I feel really blessed. Tired, but blessed. I hope you are all feeling blessed too.

New Mexico: The Land of Enchantment

Growing up here, we used to call it "The Land of Entrapment". We couldn't wait to leave. And now, I find that it has become a haven. I was deliberately vague in my previous post about the reasons behind our trip. Well, I'm going to lay it out flat. We're struggling, a lot...financially. It looks like bankruptcy is in our immediate future, and that includes losing the house. H is also still out of work. Real estate ain't what it used to be. So, in the hopes of sparing the kids and I from some of the stress and worry, H suggested that we head down to NM to stay with my folks for a bit. He is returning home today and will be starting a job on Saturday and looking for another in the meantime. He will be taking care of the necessary arrangements regarding the bankruptcy and trying to take of the rest while also searching for a new place for us to dwell.

So, that is the truth. We have been struggling all year, but it has come to a point of constant worry. Creditors finally can't call anymore, a mixed blessing because it is due to our phones being shut off. Anyway, our families and friends have been such a blessing to us. They've been looking out for us, asking if we need anything, and actually following through on that with small gifts and loans that have helped us meet our needs. I am so humbled by their service to us. I hope that I can do the same whenever I am called upon.

H left this morning, really early. The whole situation hit me hard when I reached over to his side of the bed and it was empty. He had said goodbye, but I was half asleep. I hope things will work out quickly so that we won't be apart for long.

Before I leave this post dripping with sadness, know that we are okay. We are strong people with loving families. We will not be left without anything. The kids are enjoying the month-long "vacation" at my mom and dad's. We are looking forward to Christmas and New Year and spending time with family. I hope you are all faring well in these tough times. I am off to start the day. Love to all.

FYI

Just thought I'd let you all know that the kids and I will be headed out of town on Sunday to stay with my mom and dad for a bit. Don't worry...H and I are not separating or anything like that. The kids and I are going to get a jumpstart on our holiday vacation while H stays home and works. I will continue to post while we are gone. Hope you all have a great weekend.

I survived.

I survived. I survived Thanksgiving and Mister's 12th birthday party, all in the same week. My baby is now 12. A preteen. It's hard to believe. I won't say time has flown by, but I clearly remember holding this tiny being in my teenage arms and thinking, "It's just me and you, kid." I'm so glad that he is growing into such a good person, and has a wonderful father to guide him and be an example. He is healthy, happy, and smart. And today, he had a great day.

He had about 15 guests over for some games, cake, and hanging out. That kid ended up with a few toys and $62 in his pocket. I'd say he did pretty well. I made his cake with icing light sabers and lego star wars men atop it. It was all chocolate, inside and out. I keep wondering at what age he will tell me that homemade cakes and games are too "little kid" for him. I hope not too soon. I do, however, sense that it won't be long before his birthday parties have the word "dance" on the invite and I'll be banished to another room for the duration. I think I did that at about 13 or 14. My mom was a good sport though.

Thanksgiving also went great. We had dinner at H's brother's house with his family, another brother and his family, and a friend from church. The food was worth the wait. I made my deviled eggs, candied yams, and mashed potatoes. Can't go wrong with any of those.

I hope you each had a great holiday too and didn't stress on Black Friday too much. And I hope you have plenty of turkey leftovers.

What's your blog's personality type?

I found this fun website, Typealyzer, that is like a personality test for your blog. I found it through the lovely and hilarious Lemon Gloria. Just type in your blog's web address and voila...you have your blog's personality. Here's mine:

ISFP - The Artists

The gentle and compassionate type. They are especially attuned their inner values and what other people need. They are not friends of many words and tend to take the worries of the world on their shoulders. They tend to follow the path of least resistance and have to look out not to be taken advantage of. They often prefer working quietly, behind the scene as a part of a team. They tend to value their friends and family above what they do for a living.

Yep...they grow up so fast.

Little Man actually slept through the whole night last night. This is significant. Even if it doesn't happen every night from now on, it's still pretty big for me. I still remember when Tiny started sleeping through the night...almost 8 years ago. It's sort of like a milestone. And the beginning of much more uninterrupted sleep. And, of course you know what comes next...driving, shaving, and college.

Just so you know

I am so tired. I am tired of this economy. I am tired of the sucky housing market. I am tired of fielding off creditor's calls every day. I am tired of putting $10 of gas in my van at a time. I am tired of the stress and worry. I am tired of putting the bills in a pile, knowing that I don't know when they'll get paid. I am tired of wondering what will happen next. I am tired. I'm not going to elaborate on all of the above because I am the kind of person that keeps such personal things just that, personal. But I needed to put this out into the cosmos...I AM TIRED OF IT!

Did you know...

that I still cry when Cedric Diggory is killed in "Harry Potter and the Goblet of Fire"? Yeah, I'm a dork. :)

Turning over a new...er, another leaf.

I am pursuing a new interest. Tiny has a BFF whose mother, I have come to find out, also graduated with an English degree. And like me, she also found that there was an abundance of uses for that degree in the job market...(sarcasm intended). Anyway, she decided to look into graphic design. The more she discussed it, the more my interest grew. It sounded like a job that would make good use of my English background and my creativity. So, she lent me a book that she used to begin learning photoshop. I have already started fiddling with it and have to say that I am having fun. My perfectionism might cause me to spend quite a bit of time on it, but I like what I've worked on so far. I have been following the tutorials in the book and have made these:
I just followed the instructions and the examples and it was pretty simple. The hard part will be remembering all the tools and ways to change things. I'm not even finished with the first chapter. I'm sure I will be learning a lot. Who knows? I may be able to use it for something lucrative...like a job.

Measuring my excitement and gratitude...

I meant to post about this exciting news last night, but, alas, I once again fell asleep while trying to put Little Man to bed. Anyways, I WON SOMETHING!!!

DIYdiva had a contest for her readers and I won! The prize, you ask?

This awesome diy 100% stainless steel tape measure, with two-sided grip and numbers on BOTH sides. I got so excited when I saw this on her blog that I posted a comment immediately and won! I can't wait for it to arrive. I am mentally measuring things all around the house already.

And to prove that I was meant for this measuring tape...a DIY job popped up this morning. Could be good news...or bad, depending how you look at it. The upstairs shower seems to be producing a small leak that is dripping into the downstairs kitchen when someone takes a shower. Now, my first thought was...."No, we really can't fix this right now!" However, when mentioning it to H, he seemed excited for an excuse to replace the prefab shower stall with a new tub/shower. I must admit that I would love to see an old fashioned tub in there, with the claw feet. Maybe it'll come true. In the meantime, I'll wait for my new tape measure and then measure every inch of the bathroom for the new tub.

OH MY GOSH!!!

I awoke to this headline on the internet:

"'Girl Next Door' Engaged"

Turns out that Hugh Hefner's ex, Kendra Wilkinson, became engaged to Philadelphia Eagles wide receiver Hank Baskett. I hardly ever blog about anyone famous, so what's the big deal, you ask???












Well, I went to school with Hank Baskett. He and my brother were close friends in elementary school. My brother even broke his arm in Hank's front yard. So, it's just a bit weird to see this guy we grew up with engaged to a Playboy Bunny. A little odd. But it's also a bit odd to see him as a big, buff, famous football player when the last time I saw him he was still a skinny kid, all knees and elbows. But I wish them much happiness and luck. Hank was always a nice guy.

I am so proud...

to be an American. And I am so excited and full of hope for our new President-Elect Barack Obama. I feel like my vote contributed to an important part of history. I think that so many of us are looking toward the future with a renewed hope and prayer. God bless this nation and its leaders.

Carpe Diem

I thought I would seize the moment to post while Little Man snoozes in his swing. There's so much on my mind.

It's November now and, besides it being the beginning of the feast and thankful seasons, my Mister is turning 12 this month! It's hard to believe that 12 years ago, he came into my world. I will definitely post a mushy message closer to his day.

It's Election Day! Did you vote? You NEED to vote. I think this will be a close one and every vote will count. Not to drop hints of who I voted for, but:

Doesn't matter who you like....EVERY VOTE COUNTS!

Tiny went to the orthopaedic specialist yesterday and did great. She now has a purple cast that is already donning some extensive signatures...with a silver metallic marker, of course. She really wanted me to buy her the marker before she headed back to school so all her friends could sign it. While putting on the cast, the doctor put some pressure on her arm to help straighten out the bones. According to the x-ray, it seems to have helped and he will check her again in 3 weeks. She didn't make a peep, just took some deep breaths and squeezed my hand. She's a tough cookie.

H is plugging away at his new job. It's a start up venture capitalist company that is owned by a man that has made a mint in many businesses. H is doing sales, recruiting small and large businesses for capital loans. He seems to like it and it's keeping him really busy.

I better go...Little Man is saying my time is up.

HAPPY HALLOWEEN

All that work, and the to-do list is no smaller.

I am soooo tired. I was ready for bed at about 3 p.m. today. Here was my day.

wake up at 7 a.m.
feed baby
wake kids
feed kids
change baby
take kids to school (8:30 a.m.)
feed, bathe, change baby over and over (except the bath, just one of those)
fold 4 loads of laundry that have been sitting on my couch all week
make and eat lunch
walk around park with baby while simultaneously calling insurance and doc offices to find an orthopaedic specialist that they cover (1 p.m.)
visit hospital to see about picking up x-rays
shop for dinner fixings
park and feed baby outside kids' school
pick up kids (3 p.m.)
help kids with homework
load up kids and go pick up new baby swing
reassemble old swing to prepare to give it away
finish helping kids with homework
make dinner (biscuits and sausage gravy...yum!)
eat fast and take Tiny to church activity (6:30 p.m.)
pick up visiting partner and visit with two ladies from church
come home and feed baby
go to grocery store for dinner fixings for dinner guests tomorrow
come home, feed baby and put him to sleep
plop down on couch with heavy eyelids, weary head, and a desire to not move again (and it's 9:47 p.m.)

I'm tired. And the next couple days will not slow down much. Tomorrow, I have to drop off Mister at school, take Tiny and Little Man to the hospital to pick up the x-rays, and then take Tiny to her orthopaedic appointment...all before 9:30 a.m. Pick up the kids at 3, pop the lasagna in the oven at 4, and have dinner guests at 5. Did I mention that the house is a mess and will need to be cleaned sometime before dinner? At 6, the kids' school Halloween carnival starts and they will need to be in costume. Friday night, trick or treating. Saturday night, H and I get to dine with some of the loveliest friends a girl could ask for and their wonderful husbands/fiancee at a bbq steakhouse. Oh, I'm sooo looking forward to that. Maybe I'll be able to breathe again on Sunday. Here's hoping.

I know that the long list of my day is a bit dull to read, but I think it helps me to see that even though I don't think I accomplished anything, it's evident that I ran my butt off today. I wish all of the above would burn calories like the walk did. Then I'd be in great shape in a matter of days.

A Halloween Quickie

As I speak (type?), there are art supplies all over the living room floor, laundry covering the couch, and pumpkin guts and seed all over the dining room. Welcome to my life. It's an exhaustive to-do list, a neverending "before" with rarely an "after". But at times like these, I force myself to think of the good parts of it all. My kids are happy and healthy enough to make a pumpkin mess, that's half the fun anyway. They are creative and always looking for something crafty to do. And we have the electricity and water to wash clothes clean and wear them each day, even if they are slightly wrinkled.

As you might have surmised, the kids got to carve pumpkins tonight. They sketched their own designs and then carved away. Tiny's is pretty traditional and Mister's is a bit avant garde.

Even Little Man got in on the action when H gave him a spoon.

I laughed so hard when I saw this. He's getting good at gripping things and also managing to get them into his mouth.

This weekend, we attended the fall carnival at church. All the kids were dressed up, and a few of the adults too.

Better be off...Little Man is paging me. Good night.

Tiny's not so tiny break.

Tiny broke her arm today at church. The kids were playing up on the stage in the auditorium and slippery dress shoes + slippery wood floor = Tiny falling down hard. I saw her crying quietly and showing her arm to Mister. I figured that she might have squished her finger in a door or something. But she told me about her fall and said that something popped in her arm. Looking down on her arm, I didn't really notice anything strange but she insisted that it was crooked. So, H and I looked at it, this time from another angle, and sure enough, it was bowed on the bottom of her forearm. We headed to the ER and had it x-rayed. While waiting for the doctor, her and Mister watched "The Addams Family Values" on tv and snacked. She was doing much better and said it didn't hurt that much after a while.

But it was definitely broken. She now has a splint and will see a specialist in a couple of days. The doc on call thought that since kids' bones are pretty rubbery that they might not need to set the bone. It is only broken about 3/4 of the way through one of the bones in the forearm. With kids, bones tend to mend easier and usually don't need setting with this type of break. But we will need to see if the specialist agrees with that. So, for now she is in a splint and sling (with teddy bears and balloons on it). She is also on motrin and in bed, resting. I'm so thankful that it wasn't a much worse injury and that it seems that it will heal fine on its own...we hope. So, prayers are appreciated.

I'm off to bed...a lot of excitement for one day.

I know when I've been beat.

I threw in the towel today. I have been planning to make the kids' costumes, like I do almost every year. Mister decided to be Boba Fett, Tiny was going to be R2D2, and Little Man was going to be Yoda. Cute, right? Well...not so fun when you only have a couple of days left before the first costumed Halloween party and you're not even halfway finished with the first costume. For the past few days, I've been one giant ball of stress, frustration, and ill temper. Trying to draw all the little doodads of R2D2's circuitry is not easy when you have a fussy 3 1/2 month old next to you, frustrated that you're not paying attention to him and he has decided that he will not nap for more than 15 minutes at a time...ALL DAY LONG!

Well, last night, I had an inkling that I may have taken on something much larger than myself and my sanity. So, at about 5 p.m. tonight, I told the kids to put their shoes on and load into the truck. I explained that I did not have the time, energy or sanity to complete their costumes as planned and that we would need to buy some instead. Initially, they were a bit disappointed that they would not be able to carry out their Star Wars theme. However, they were quickly over it when they chose to be black-hooded executioners, complete with double-sided axes and face paint. And tomorrow, I will set out to find Little Man a cute costume of his own. I found this online:

Unfortunately, it is not in any store within 100 miles of us, according to the Wal-Mart locator. So sad. He would have looked perfect in it.

Yeah, I felt bad about giving up on the costumes for about 5 minutes. Then I realized that I wouldn't be trying to finish three very difficult costumes before Saturday and I also wouldn't be biting everyone's heads off in the process. Nice trade-off, I'd say. We can't all be Supermom, not even for Halloween.

Much more than you bargained for.

A few little known things about me:

I have a desire to join the Air Force.

Most of the men in my family have served in some branch of the military and I have always felt proud of them for doing it. And I always pictured myself joining. When I was in junior high, a friend and I had the plan to join the military and let it fund our way through college. I wanted to be a lawyer back then. Well, pregnant at 16 and married at 19 changed the plans a bit. She ended up joining the Army and hated it. (FYI, Army and AF...two very different branches of the military. 'Nuff said.) Anyway, I still think about joining regularly and the appeal has not diminished much over the years.

I can eat intimidating amounts of chocolate and baked goods.

It's amazing that I am not 200 lbs. However, I do notice that the older I get, the less forgiving my body is of it.

I drink an insane amount of water each day.

Which is supposed to be excellent for you and your complexion. Well, not so sure it's helped with that much. But I do know that I am so used to drinking it that five minutes without a tall glass of water in sight leaves me completely parched.

I am going to force myself to write a book one day.

It'll happen. I can feel the book, somewhere inside of me just waiting to come together. I may need to submit myself to NaNoWriMo...as insane as it is.

I like DIY shows and have a desire to obtain all the DIY and tool knowledge and skills I can.

There's something about the idea of being able to tear down a wall with the ferocity of an animal (and a hammer) and redo it into something beautiful and functional. Not to mention that all the tools are really cool too.

So, I now challenge you to leave a comment containing a little known nugget about yourself. Let's see who can come up with something really unique/funny/embarassing.

Happiness in Hard Times

Where to begin? I have a rare moment this morning. Little Man is snoozing upstairs with H and the kids are at school. I almost feel like I should just sit on the floor and meditate. Maybe that would clear out some of the things cluttering my mind.

H is looking for a side job since real estate is so slow. Now is not the best time for the profession. Thankfully, we have a lot of support around us, we are really blessed. But, like millions of others, these are some hard times we're experiencing.

I read on the news yesterday of a lot of people that are so downtrodden by the economy and financial crisis that they are taking their lives and the lives of others. This stunned me. Maybe it's because I am so blessed with a loving family, great friends and so much support that it's hard for me to think that life would ever be so hard that I would feel like there is nothing left for me here. There's so much more to life. I told H that even if we were completely broke and living with our parents again, no job, no money...we would still have so much. We are healthy, we have each other...that is a lot. I hope others feel that way too. So, to all my family and friends, I hope you all know just how loved you are and how much it means to me to have you in my life.

On to happier things, Little Man is growing so big. Even on the hard days, he's a joy. And, boy, he loves his brother and sister.

That smile warms my heart. And I look forward to each breathy laugh. How could I ever dwell on the negative when I have such a handsome pick-me-up every day?

I could post more, my life is so full right now, but I better start the day. Have a blessed day!

My girls.

Oh, those girls I love. I wish we could rewind life sometimes and relive the best moments.

Our hostel rocked.

Bree falling off the log right when I was taking the pic at Warwick Castle.

Bree!!! It's our lesbian wedding picture! (sorry, inside joke)
I still can't believe you talked me into driving in Ireland.
The best friends a girl could have.
Ponchos with Shakesperean quotes...can't get much nerdier than us.
That bloody pizza.
Is Liz sticking it up her nose? And what was Whit doing?

DIYdiva

I came across a new blog today that I loved so much, I read every archived post. It is DIYdiva and I now have tool-envy. I really want this girl's skills and her tools, especially her newly-acquired Makita drill. Anyways, besides working construction and redoing her homes, she also makes these awesome brooms. Yeah, I said brooms. Check these out.

How awesome are those?!? I want the one in the middle really bad, but for $65, I will need to wait for that indulgence. I would love to hang out with this chica and pick her brain for all the DIY expertise she has stored in there. Check her out.

I Did Something Stupid: Part Deux

This may become an ongoing theme. I decided to rearrange the livingroom furniture today, something I do only 1 or 2 times a year. If you've ever seen my furniture, you know that we're not talking about dinky, light IKEA furniture here. Nope, big and sturdy. After changing my mind on the layout three times and moving almost every piece around four times, my back was feeling the burn. Sure enough, an hour after I was done and was finally relaxing on the couch, I adjusted myself slightly and felt that familiar twinge run from my lower back to the middle. Yep, I tweaked my back...again. This has become a semi-regular occurrence in the last few years. I remember once trying to pull a hangar out from under a door where it was stuck, and I actually felt something pop in my lower back. So, I now anticipate that I will be quite sore tomorrow and will be walking funny (think along the lines of a strutting rooster). It usually only last a day or two, just enough time to appreciate my back when it's not tweaked out. Hope you're faring better than I.

Veiled Beauty

You may recognize this statue from "Pride and Prejudice" (the newer version with Keira Knightley). It is called Veiled Vestal by Raffaele Monti. And it is the most beautiful marble bust I have ever seen. I bet it's even more breathtaking in person. Just thought I'd share the beauty.

Vote!!!

Ok. I'm completely pilfering this from Nicole, but I thought that it was really profound. Let me be clear first...I am not, nor have I ever been, tied down to one political party. I believe that we should go with the best individual for the job. Having said that, I thought that this quote was as true today as it was then.

"In this 20th century, every great step forward has come during Democratic administrations. Every movement backward has come under Republican auspices, and it is the people who have paid dearly...Too much is now at stake--here and throughout the world--to take the wrong path now. There is one way to stop the forces of reaction. Get every vote out on election day, and make it count. You can't afford to waste your votes this year. I'm not asking you just to vote for me. Vote for YOURSELVES!... Vote for the standard of living that you have won under a Democratic administration! Get out there on election day, and vote for your future!"-- Harry Truman, 1948

Tha'll Do...

Nothing much new. Just taking things one day at a time. Two days this week, I was so exhausted by midday that I was telling H that I believe we are done having kiddos. I love my kids to pieces, but you really do forget just how much energy they require; mental, physical, and emotional. I even managed to fall asleep laying in Little Man's carseat the other night. Yeah, I need more sleep. So, I'm trying to get to bed much earlier and trying to not wear myself out. It's odd how quickly your mood and energy can change. Yesterday, I got Little Man to sleep in a good nap and was just pumped to get out of the house for a bit. So, I made my way to the grocery store...I know, such an exciting life. Anyway, by the time I was checking out at the register, I was exhausted again. And the other day, I was nodding off at 5 p.m. and then raring to go by 8 p.m. Odd.

The LonDolls dinner was great. We met up at a bakery and had sandwiches. It was wonderful to sit and visit with the girls, sitting and chatting with no rush to be elsewhere. We really missed Whit though since she couldn't travel down. No fun. But the girls are all doing well, living life. I really appreciated H for watching the kids and tending to Little Man while I was out. I think I need to make it a priority to get out every once in a while and relax and visit with my girls. I wish that Jen, my love in Maine, lived closer. I could see us packing up all the kids and taking off for a whole weekend each month. I love and miss her to pieces.

I can understand why so many women slip into postpartum depression. New moms are tired, they're stressed, they are lucky to get a shower everyday, and when we look in the mirror, it's easy to focus on the lingering weight and sagginess. I understand. And that's why it's so important to take your focus off these things and place them where they should be...your beautiful little one, making time for friends, and spoiling yourself with more rest and less "must do's". It's really hard to do all this when you are so used to putting everyone else first, but it's so important. I have checked out a couple of library books that I never finished. Who knows if I'll actually get to read them, but at least they are ready for me to steal away for a moment and soak up some reading. I also dug out some material that I bought for a couple of baby blankets. Not sure if they'll be completed anytime soon, but they are sitting there, tempting me if I have a moment. It's so important to give yourself an outlet. Jen does so with her beautiful crafts, and is currently focusing her creativity on her house. I have some crafts and good books....and an occasional nap.

Sure, life is stressful right now. Things aren't going perfect. But we're healthy, we're happy, and we're still smiling. That's enough.

I did something stupid.

After Little Man's doctor appointment today, I made my way to the mall. I rarely go to the mall unless I have a reason. Today, I was going to Motherhood Maternity to buy some super comfy nursing bras for my niece who lives an hour from the nearest location of this store. Anyway, while checking out, the cashier asked if I'd like to donate a dollar to the March of Dimes and receive a little ring on a bracelet that said "Be Healthy, Be Happy". So, I said, "Sure, why not?"

I was not fond of the string bracelet that was holding the ring and removed it. Since the ring looked a bit small, I first placed it on my pinky. Too big. Then I put it on my ring finger. It only went to my knuckle. After a few tries on other fingers, I decided to try the ring finger again and I was able to work it over my knuckle. I realized immediately that that was a mistake. A stupid, stupid mistake. In case you don't know, I have huge knuckles. Not elephant man huge, but huge. Every minute that the ring was on my finger, it seemed to get tighter and tighter. I tried to lick my finger and slide it off. Nope. I tried to coat it in soap and water. Uh-uh. H tried to help by pouring oil on it and pulling and twisting. No and OWWW.

After trying this a few times and winding up with a lot of pain, a purple finger and an indention, I knew it was time to find a professional. I called a nearby jeweler and explained my situation. He told me to come on over and he could try to cut it off. After a short drive with an aching, red finger, the jeweler snapped the ring in two with some cutters and I came out pretty unscathed, except a nick from the ring breaking. I thanked him profusely and he smiled that smile that you only get when you've just been freed from the consequences of doing something STUPID. I promised him I would never work a ring over my knuckle again. Not unless I want it there for eternity, and a purple finger.

In other news...
Little Man had his 2 month appointment today. He now weighs 12 lbs. 1 oz. and is 21 inches long. It's no wonder he no longer fits in his small outfits and is outgrowing his size 2 diapers. This kid is packing it on. Everything looks healthy and great. He even did a great job being calm and patient while we waited for the doctor. And all that was only rewarded with a bunch of vaccinations; one oral and three injections. I hate it when they have to do stuff like shots, PKUs, and his circumcision...oy vey, don't get me started on that. I will not be disappointed if I never see another one of those in my life. He let out some heartbreaking sobs and, later, was sore and screaming. After some tylenol and a nap, he was much better. I hate that we have to do it again in two months.

My aunt is getting married tomorrow. She has been a widow for almost 12 years. Her husband, my uncle, was a great man. So, it probably is expected that it would take that long to find someone else that would make her happy again. I hear he's a great guy and I hope they are very happy. I'm terribly sad that we can't be there for her special day. That's one of the bummers of living so far away. Her sons will be there and I haven't seen them in years. I would love to sit and chat with everyone and be there with my family.

Tomorrow is a busy day. I will be attending a baby shower for my sis-in-law's sister, H and the kids are going on a hike with his brother, and I am meeting the LonDolls for dinner. A few wonderful hours to catch up with my girls and take a little break from mommyhood. Don't get me wrong, I love it. But it's nice to have a little time to relax with friends without getting spit up on, changing diapers, or walking around in a bouncy way to soothe a fussy baby. Unfortunately, I don't think Whit will make it. But I'm still hoping for a great dinner.

Well, that's all for now. Please send good thoughts and prayers this way. Times are tough for most, and we're hanging in there too. Love ya.

Good Genes, I Guess.

Nothing new or terribly witty to post. Just the usual. I'm getting decent sleep. Little Man wakes up every 3-4 hours, gets changed, eats, and passes back out. He is becoming more intentionally responsive. So, when he smiles, he's actually smiling at me and not just because he probably passed gas or something. He is also seeing things that are farther away and his movements of his arms and legs are more controlled. During the day, he'll stay awake and alert for an hour or more and then he'll eat and pass out for naps. Pretty manageable. *crosses fingers* He is also growing very fast.I actually got quite a bit more done today than most days. I cleaned the living room, did some laundry, sorted some clothes, and paid some bills. I still need to do the program flier for church tomorrow, get the kids in the bath, and make something for dinner. *sigh*

Bree was finally able to come over and meet Little Man. She squeezed him and hugged him and snuggled him and, basically, loved all over him. It's hard not to. He's so squishy and soft. I can't wait to do the same to her kiddos when she has babies. They'll be gorgeous. I mean, look at them. It would be impossible for these two to make a baby that is not darling.

Tee hee.

9 Years and Counting

Today was our 9th wedding anniversary. 9 years ago, H and I said "I do" after only knowing each other for four months. He jumped into an instant family when he married me and took on the role of Mister's father. And I have to say, he's done wonderfully. He is a great father and a caring husband.

We knew that we weren't going to do anything big for this anniversary since we just had Little Man. So, after my doctor appointment this morning, we headed up the mountain and ate lunch at a restaurant at a ski resort. Of course LM was with us, but he did well. H and I ate pizza and drank Dr. Pepper until we couldn't possibly have anymore. It was nice to eat and talk and enjoy the mountain air and scenery. I love when we get the opportunities to just sit and talk. Connecting, even for just a bit, feels great.

After that, it was back to life. I picked up the kids from school and then we headed back to their school later for the open house. And then a quick trip to the grocery store, home, dinner and off to bed for the kids. A simple day, but a nice one.

Funny, I don't remember all this from the last time I had a baby.....8 years ago.

Some "new" mom insights (the "" marks are only there because I have a new baby...not because I am new at being a mom):

Babies have a sixth sense. When you have successfully gotten them to sleep, they can sense when you are thinking of laying them down. They choose that moment to stir awake and you have to start over again. When they are napping, they can also tell when you are trying to do something productive or entertaining, such as the dishes or trying to update your blog. They choose that moment to wake up early from their nap and immediately expect food.

New moms no longer see the appeal of long hair. Sure, it looks great, especially from all those vitamins you've been taking for 9+ months. However, you regularly find yourself wondering just how much time you could save styling it at a shorter length. Shorter length = shorter styling time = more baby naptime to do other things. You are also not feeling very attractive at this time in your life anyway (ponytails, spit up on clothes, no shower for 3 days), so why not just cut off a large portion of that hair that is not getting styled anyway? Believe me, I'm seriously fighting the urge.

Clothing choices are no longer ruled by fashion. It doesn't even really matter if you match anymore. The only definite requirements are that there is no visible spit up spots and your top can easily be lifted up to the height of your chin in order to pull out a boob and provide nourishment...which then shortly ends up spit back on your clothes. Seriously, I asked H the other day, with multiple wet spots on my shirt, why I bother to get dressed at all.

Nursing does not require that you are awake. You can lie on your side, pop the boob in his mouth and lapse into a coma without him missing an ounce of food.

And Finally...

They are worth it. No matter how tiring the day can become and how little sleep you manage during the night, you wake up each morning, gaze at that chubby-cheeked face and smile...because he's yours.

Finally...a moment.

I can't begin to convey just how busy it's been. And that's just taking care of the baby, the kids and the house. Little Man is doing well, growing round and eating and eating. I remember that things were really busy after having Tiny. Mister was only 3 years old and quite a handful at the time. It felt like I had three kids instead of two. And, well, now that I have three, I have to say that it does seem easier this time around. Sure, I'm not getting much done around the house and I'm ready for a nap every afternoon. But, the kids are older and a big help. And having H work from home helps too. Before, he was still in the military and working all day, sometimes 12-hour shifts. And his schedule kept changing too. It's nice to hand off Little Man for a few minutes so that I can have a break or do the dishes or make something to eat.

Another thing that I have been noticing is my post-baby body. I have, with both deliveries, regained my pre-baby body within reasonable amounts of time. And it seems that I am being blessed in that way again. I have lost about 80% of the saggy, squishy belly that is usually left behind after it's held a tiny human for 9 months. It's taken a month to lose that, so I'm hoping that I'll be even more slim in another 4 weeks. Who knows? Maybe I'll even fit in some of my jeans, instead of my maternity pants.

Fun news: My Bree is finally back from Florida and I'm really looking forward to see her soon. Melissa has a bday coming soon. The bad news is that she will be moving on that day. The good news is that she's moving in with Liz. Couldn't think of a better roommate to have. But Bree and I are hoping that we can all get together soon and celebrate anyway.

Well, Little Man is waking up from another very short nap. Later.

Breaking Dawn

I just finished reading this greatly anticipated conclusion to the impressive series. I liked it. Sure, there were some parts that were a bit anticlimactic. But I think it was pretty well done. Though many readers may not like this, I like it when the author leaves just a few strings untidy, loose ends. It lets the reader use their imagination and continue the story in their own minds. All in all, I will continue to recommend this series to everyone.

Family is a blessing.

I haven't been blogging because I had family in town. It's been really great. My parents stayed with us for a week and helped us out sooo much around the house and with the baby. I love it when they visit because my mom always helps me whip the house into shape and my dad fixes anything that needs it. And they loved spending time with their new grandson. They love their grandbabies. It makes me sad that we don't live nearer to them so that they can enjoy the kids more often, and the kids can enjoy them too. And it made me really sad when they had to leave early this morning.

I would love to live nearer to my family, but there are things that hold me back from moving there. Having gone through the school system there, I was not very impressed with it. I would probably decide to homeschool the kids if we ever lived there. Also, the nearest university is an hour away and I plan to be back in school in the next year and a half. Another reason, and I am hesitant to state it, is that I don't think the peer groups that the kids would be around if we lived there would be a very good influence for them. I know, I know...you can have those anywhere you live. But, like I said before, I've lived there and experienced it. The kids in that town are always grouping together. You have the hispanics, the preppy whites, the blacks, etc. In school, we felt like we HAD to belong to one of these groups...not an easy task when you're a mixture of more than one. And once you were accepted, it was hard to resist peer pressure from the group. It was like that high school was the embodiment of an after-school tv special. It sucked. While I liked being near my extended family, school sucked. And because of it, I got into a lot of trouble there. I saw family members, friends, and church members alike making poor decisions...mainly influenced by their surroundings and people around them. Am I eager to uproot my kids and put them in these situations? Heck no.

So, that is why, thus far, we have not moved back.

My brother and his family also stayed with us for a couple days on their way back to Alaska. My brother is in the Air Force and is being stationed there for the second time. They loved it the first time they were there and are glad to be going back. The distance from family is a negative, and the price of living. But it was the best of the choices given them. I hope we will get to travel up and visit them while they are there this time. H is definitely in favor of that, and going fishing up there. Their kids are split on the move. Their daughter is happy to go back, but their son is not. He made a lot of friends at their last location. I hope they will do okay with the move and make the best of it.

Well, I was starting to get used to having a lot of help, and now they've all gone home. Maybe we can try to make enough income to fly family out whenever we like. I wish. Well, this post is starting to sound like a pity party, and I try to never throw those. So, just know that we're all healthy, happy and doing well. Little Man is a good sleeper and is growing fast. (But not too fast, Bree.) The kids are ready for school to start in a few weeks and H is keeping busy with his work. I hope you're all doing well too. Love you.

Oh Yeah!

Because you should never underestimate a guy that can make you laugh...and make you hot on a cold night.

A Head's Up

Just a warning...my posts may become fewer and far between. My days have been filled with breastfeeding, naps, diaper changes, and staring at my new little man. That is also what I will be referring to him as in my posts...Little Man. He is filling out from all that good eating and his jaundice also seems to be getting better. He will see the doctor again next Friday.


He sleeps pretty well at night, in three hour stretches. We also seem to be working out the kinks and hiccups of breastfeeding. I'm hoping that that will get much better soon. This is, by far, the hardest part of adapting to a new little one. So, in the meantime, I may post some new pictures intermittently, but will probably ease up on postings for a while. Hope you will all keep checking back though.

HE'S HERE!!!

Matthew Caleb was born on Friday, July 18, 2008 at 11:16 a.m. He was 7 lb. 11 1/2 oz. and 19 in. long. He was also two weeks early, and I have no complaints about that. My water broke at 1:45 a.m. and he arrived after 11 a.m. Not bad. The labor went well, especially with the epidural. We are both doing well and are now home resting. So, without further ado, let me introduce you to our new little man.

How skinny is too skinny?

I read this article today about the actress Megan Fox. You might know her as Mikaela in "Transformers". The director, Michael Bay, of both "Transformers" and the sequel in pre-production right now has asked the actress to gain 10 lbs. before beginning filming the new movie. Apparently, she had lost some weight for a recent film and was asked to regain it because Bay "doesn't like skinny girls". Now, upon first reading this, I had no objections. I applaud the use of "healthy" actresses. However, I was a little confused when observing some pics of the actress. Let me show you...

The first pic is from the first "Transformers".

The next one was posted by TMZ.com just yesterday.

Can someone point out the difference? Because I'm having trouble seeing it.

By the way, I know that the movie is in pre-production because they are filming it near my hometown, the same place they filmed the first film's opening scene in the "middle east". Yeah, that was filmed in NM, not Qatar. I loved seeing those familiar dunes and mountains when I was in the packed theater at the premiere. It made me a little homesick...and proud.

He's Awaiting the Final Curtain

I am so tired. This kiddo is sitting as low as he can get without starting to come out. Even the midwife was surprised by how low he was today. But, alas, no further progress. I am still dilated to a 2 and am 60% effaced, same as three weeks ago. You would think that with all my cramping, contractions, and uncomfortableness, that something would be happening. Nope, looks like this kiddo has decided to stick around to the very end. I have about 15 days left until my due date.

But I'm not just sitting around counting the days. I am still working on the house. Currently, I am doing Mister's room, aka the black hole. That kid has waaaay too many toys. So, we are drastically downsizing the loot and organizing the rest in bins. I bought three bins; one for stuffed animals, one for legos, and once for the rest of the toys. The catch is that he has to choose among his belongings wisely because if they don't fit in the bins, he can't keep them. I will be doing the same with Tiny's room. I'm also hoping to downsize mine and H's clothes and belongings. Less stuff, less mess, more time.

I am also becoming acutely aware of just how bare my walls look. I may need to start planning some future painting projects...you know, post-baby arrival.

And now for some pics from the camping trip. Enjoy.

I may post more pics later. The internet is dreadfully slow today.

A 4-Man Tent Does Not Always Mean Just That

We went camping this last weekend, just for one night. Some of H's business associates were doing a family hike and overnight campout in one of the canyons last Friday night. I told H that I was willing to go on 2 conditions: 1) I didn't have to go on the hike. It was 3 miles long and I get tired going up the stairs at home. 2) We brought smores. So, he agreed to my very reasonable conditions and we packed up and headed to the mountains.

Liz was gracious enough to offer us her 4-man tent to use and we purchased an air mattress and some new sleeping bags. Everyone met up at one of the ski resorts and headed out for the hike. Me? I stayed at the resort and hung out in the truck, watching "Stranger Than Fiction" on my laptop and eating snacks. The mountain air was a pleasant 50+ degrees and I surrounded myself with pillows in the back seat. I had my own private drive-in theater. After about 2 1/2 hours, H and the kids returned from the hike and we headed down to the campsite that the group reserved. Less than half of the hiking group met up at the campsite and less than half of that number stayed for the night.

I found a nice, flat spot for us to pitch the tent, then H blew up the air mattress, and set up the blankets and pillows. The tent went up really easy and we set the mattress in before pumping it. It is a queen mattress and H bought a manual pump. Just imagine trying to blow up a really thick queen mattress with a bicycle pump. H was huffing and puffing while airing it up. I asked him how much the electric pump was at the store and he replied, with a bit of forlorn in his voice, "$12." Needless to say, we'll be returning the hand pump and getting the electric. After finally getting it set up, Mister found a leak in the mattress, which H had to patch.

After all that work, we then started some dinner. We barbecued some kabobs with beef rib meat on the grill. Others had brought foods wrapped in foil and threw them in the fire pit to cook. Since the ribs would take a little while, the kids and I happily moved on to the smores. There is nothing like a gooey, messy, warm smore over the campfire. It was heaven. The meat also turned out just right. We all sat around the fire, eating and chatting. I had not met any of the people there before and we had a pretty good time.

When it was late and time for bed, I left H chatting by the fire and headed for the tent. Once inside and comfortable, I realized that just because a tent is referred to as a 4-man tent doesn't necessarily guarantee that 4 people will fit in it. This is especially true when 2 of the 4 are a pregnant woman and the large man that is H. With me and the kids situated, I knew there was no way that H would be able to fit in with us comfortably. He ended up at the bottom of the mattress, under our feet. He and I didn't get a lot of sleep that night. This was compounded by the fact that I remembered right before heading to bed that I require at least 2-3 trips to the bathroom at night. Thankfully, there was a restroom just one campsite over. But, I have to say, growing up on horror movies, particularly "Friday the 13th" did not make the trips to the bathroom very comfortable...not to mention all the animals that I knew were staring out of the bushes at me. As long as they weren't wearing masks and carrying machetes, they didn't bother me much.

In the morning, H informed me that our camp had had some visitors early that morning. He had gotten up and opened the tent door to find two moose in the camp. They were just passing through, sniffing the tents and checking out the three guys that chose to camp out in the open. H woke them up and warned them of the moose nearby, but he was really in awe of them. Unfortunately, the moose had headed out before we could get up to see them. We did see a doe, though, and a lot of chipmunks. We made a breakfast of bacon and scrambled eggs. Bacon over a campfire cannot be beat. Yum! After breakfast and some more chatting, we packed up, cleaned up and headed home...where we quickly laid down and passed out for a while. It was a lot of fun and I'm glad we went.

The Newest Member of our Church

We had a very full weekend. Thursday, we watched fireworks in our area and they were some of the best the city has ever put on. Friday, I cleaned house and we attended a bbq at my sis-in-law's sister's house. After dinner and some birthday cake for her husband, the kids lit fireworks and we enjoyed the cool breeze of the evening. We headed home late and passed out easily.
Saturday was the best day of all. Tiny was baptized at our church. She has been really excited about it and was all smiles and anticipation. After cleaning up the house more and preparing some food, we headed to the church. I helped her dress in her white baptism jumpsuit and led her back out into the room. We sang the opening hymn "I am a Child of God", had an opening prayer, and I gave a talk on baptism. I told Tiny that getting baptized was the best decision I ever made and that my life has been greatly blessed for choosing to follow the Lord, she being one of those blessings. It was a short talk, but the smile she gave me said that it was important to her.Her daddy then took her into the baptismal font and performed the sacred ordinance. She came up to me, wet and smiling from ear to ear. I helped her change into dry clothes and brushed her hair. All the while, I was talking to her about how proud I was of her and explained what I meant when I said that she was one of my blessing of baptism. Had I not joined the church, I wouldn't have met her father, and then been blessed with the wonderful family that I have. It was such a special moment that I was able to share with her. After we returned to the room, we heard a talk on the Holy Ghost, after which she received that blessing. We followed with another hymn, "I Love to See the Temple" and had a closing prayer.
Afterward, everyone, family and friends, came up to congratulate Tiny. At one point, she whispered to me, "I can't stop smiling." She had a large grin on her face. Her face and her eyes were bright with the Spirit of God. She had that smile for the rest of the day. We had a little get together at the house afterward. Many of our family and friends came to eat lunch and a cake that my sis-in-law made that looks like a set of scriptures with a verse that Tiny picked out. My sis-in-law is really gifted when it comes to making cakes.

All in all, Tiny had a great day and that makes me happy.


And the day didn't end there. Some folks from H's graduating class were having a picnic since many of them would be in town for the 4th. So, after about an hour of recuperation, I was ready to go again and we headed down to it. H got to visit with a lot of old friends and I made a few new ones. The kids ran wild by the creek and had a blast. We finally made it home late and crashed for the night. It was a long, good day.


Today, we just had church. I'm thankful for that because I don't know how much more excitement I can take in one weekend. Now, we're going to relax a bit. I see the doc again on Thursday and am hoping that some progress has been made. This much discomfort and fatigue is more worth it if I know it's doing something. I hope you all had a good holiday weekend and are doing well.


By the way, here's the latest belly pic. Looking low?