Wednesday, June 20, 2007

Griswold's Vegas Vacation, Family Reunion, and a Visit to the Great State of Self-Awareness

I'm still hanging in there. I might only be babysitting one more day. I really like the girls, but they are a lot more energy and attention-necessary than I'm used to. My house is also not used to it. So, cross your fingers that their mom will be able to get them into the daycare she wants. If that goes through, I will begin painting Mister's room soon. Fun news: We'll be going to Las Vegas soon. H is going to attend a real estate seminar there and we're tagging along for vacation. I've booked our hotel and have been checking out activities for us and the kids. I've only been to Vegas once, and that was pretty much just passing through. We only walked around for about an hour on the strip in the middle of the night on a weekday. Not terribly eventful. So, we're all looking forward to the trip. Sometime afterwards, we will also be traveling one state over for a family reunion (H's side). I'm looking forward to being able to float the local river for a couple hours with the family. Nothing better in the summer than that, followed by pizza at our fav place there.

I've been thinking a lot about what I'm going to do, work-wise. I don't want to go into the program early this fall if I'm not sure that I want to teach yet. I want to teach, in theory. But I haven't had enough classroom experience to decide definitively on my future yet. I am considering going into real estate. Real estate is something I enjoy, and it definitely has earning potential. One other career that I heard of was that of a book reviewer. I came across a blog once and the author was a book reviewer for Barnes and Noble. When I read this, my first thought was that that had to be the best job in the world. You read a ton of books and write about them. I love both ends of that. Unfortunately, I couldn't find that blog again. However, I have come across a few websites that give great advice on how to jumpstart this kind of career and get you where you want to be with it (eg. working for a publishing house full-time). So, those are some options. I really like working alone most of the time, and both of those could fit that bill in many ways.

I figure, it's my future, it's my life, and I want to do something I'm going to enjoy...and right now, I don't think I enjoy a classroom full of attitude-ridden, mouthy teenagers. There are a few things in my life that I have been able to figure out about myself. One, is that I know that I would not make a great mother to a large number of children. I have decided that 2-3 will be what I can handle best, and I already have 2 perfectly wonderful kids. Two, I have MANY interests (result of the ADD???) and I will likely have more than one career in life. Three, I am what I like to call sweet and sour. The majority of me is the sweet; caring, concerned, willing to help, compassionate, loving, outgoing, funny, and happy. However, I, like many others, also am haunted by a sour side. I have days of gloom and lack of energy. On these days, I'd rather not cook, clean, or even leave the house if at all possible. I am also stubborn, a bit cranky, and negative-thinking on these days. Thankfully, this is the minority side and has become fewer and far between over the years.

These are all things that took me at least 25 years of life to figure out about myself and I still have to remind myself of this knowledge sometimes. It's like I'm actually slowly getting to know myself. Does everyone do this??? Sometimes, I would feel bad because I thought I should try to make myself more like the person that can have 8 kids and do well with it, could pick one career and stick with it for life, or that can't just suck it up on a bad day and move on with a smile and an abundance of energy cause it would all just be in my head. But after a lot of arguing with myself over how I should feel and how I actually felt about each of these, I realized that it was my life, my choices, and I should do what works best for me, not what I think everyone expects of me. Afterwards, I also realized that the more I understand myself, accept my limitations, and reach forward in my abilities,...the more I like myself. I'm, of course, still a work in progress...but I like that, and I'm looking forward to getting better acquainted with myself.


Icy said...

I think we all slowly get to know ourselves, I know I have. I think learning who we are and how we deal with the world is one of the most important experiences we can have as a person.

amisare waswerebeen said...

Thanks. I completely agree.